BUT WTF how can this shit happen so fucking frequently like after every 2 games there is a game where I'm literally trying to win the game 1v5(1v9 actually because not only are they absolutely fucking useless but they are feeding machines). Absolutely worthless shit stains just running around like headless chicken. They don't listen or do anything useful, they just run around like retards and get caught in the worst positions and that is all they do. I have no idea wtf is happening like this thing is expected to happen once every 10 games where its impossible to win a game but why the fuck am I getting games like that after every 2 games. Also what baffles me more than anything is that how the fuck can someone be soo fucking retarded like literally 50 IQ pigs in my team in those games, absolutely brain dead. I'm seriously forced to believe that these are not even real people but fucking flee infested apes behind those computer screens.
I'm not the one to bitch and moan about my team
That account looks like it was calibrated a few years back, forgotten while you grinded on another account and raised skill, now you remember that account and decided to play again.
The purpose of this thread though, you want self-gratification? 
Obviously there is a breaking point and I got frustrated otherwise I won't be making a fucking thread about it. Shit is getting out of hand and I just had a 1v9 hence the para you quoted. Yes I'm not the one to bitch and moan about my team. I have lost a lot of times before and I just try to win the next game instead of complaining about my team, this time it was different because this is happening way too frequently.
No I don't give a fuck what you think of me, its 2 FUCKING K MMR and self-gratification makes no fucking sense. Also by your logic even if I am a significantly higher MMR player imagine what it would be like for a real 2k player to try and climb out of that region? That's the fucking purpose of the thread to figure out how the fuck is something like this suddenly happening so frequently and is there a way to go around it.
Maybe you play on bad times a.k.a where most players that are queuing are uneducated fuckboys who skip school for dota, etc
When you purposefully calibrated at low MMR, then played relatively high MMR, came back to low MMR, what did you expect? Also in they year you stopped playing on that account a lot of new players have started playing, and a lot of them don't even read patch notes or know of their existence.
Real 2ks either just deal with it or whine and fall to Dunning-Kruger, it's been that way ever since MMR was introduced, now though it is especially toxic since little children can play Dota 2 now, due to globalization and all that crap.
Haha cool story bro. How the hell do u get that many commends except if u beg for them at the end of games
He has been playing exceptionally well, like how Blunt is playing on his 1k account.
Kyle gets many commends even though he is an asshat in games, maybe people just overlook his saltiness in mic because he uses "sir" during insulting.
TRIGGERED
@Pitou "When you "purposefully" calibrated at low MMR"
What The Fuck are you talking about? You think I created an account and started intentionally feeding? What the fuck are you even trying to say here?
"When you purposefully calibrated at low MMR, then played relatively high MMR, came back to low MMR, what did you expect?"
Not to play games that are 1v9 soo fucking frequently... ? Was that a real fucking question? What the fuck are you even talking about?
"though it is especially toxic since little children can play Dota 2 now"
I think that is the only thing you have said soo far which is not down right retarded. Plus I played on this account but it was unranked and I never left it. I was spending more time on CS:GO and I just need to update dotabuff for this account.
I realize that when I have retards in my team it's because I couldn't adapt and I fkd up my laning big time allowing them to be aggressive on other lanes.
https://www.dotabuff.com/players/216750406/matches?page=7 Well sorry if I thought you really tried to calibrated low MMR. I did a little digging and this is what I saw.
If you play at a low level game when you come from a high level, ofcourse everyone in the game will all be L O W S K I L L so you've got to be expecting that. Dunno why you act so surprised. Although one can argue that enemy team has more chance of being noob because compared to their 5 your team has 4 since you aren't a noob, you're winning more than losing aren't you? Which means it falls to you to win more (62% winrate) if you were all bad your winrate would be around 50%. After all, the only constant factor in your games is you.
Yea the day you find me a single game where I asked for 1 fucking commend from a single person is the day I delete dota. That never happened and that will never happen. Also I don't abuse (expect for my last couple of games I was seriously frustrated)I just play my game and try to win, if I can't do that then its onto the next game that's pretty much it. If you play better than others and don't talk shit when clearly they are dragging you down they will pretty much commend you if you end up winning the game. Also in my last game I was pretty much abusing alchem(and others) a lot since I was pretty frustrated with this shit happening frequently(also not to mention that he was retarded to a point where I was convinced that he was not a real human) and I did that in chat even then when I came out there was an increase of 4 commends. So yea I don't really give a fuck about commends but that's all there is to it.
With a quick view of your full recent matches page, I can see that you are drawing out games too long.
I mean by thirty minutes your stats would look something like 13/2/xx. But games end at close to 40+ minutes, by 30 minutes you would have INSANE networth/xp advantage, why wouldn't you end at that time and avoid risking a comeback because you died 2 extra times trying to get more kills?
Yea u have a high kda play style that nets you a lot of respect and commends when u win. Makes sense. I too have pretty high win rate heroes on my front page but as u can see my kda is utter crap because I just fkn yolo and win games.
If anything this just shows u the mindset of low mmr players. They are so concerned with kda as a measure of skill. Even valve uses that as a metric for skill. Nothing bad can be said about having a good kda. If anything though, it could be that you're just conservative, not taking risk, hence closing games out much longer than necessary. Without giving your team chance to participate in your kills you may get that 1v9 feeling a lot more. Just some perspective for you
@Pitou Finally something remotely useful from you. Let me tell you a secret, I'm not a high level fucking player. See that Jacked guy? Look at his winrate and see the difference between party and solo. I have something similar going, the difference is for 2 months I went for unranked and played lobbies only after I came back from a 4 month time off. With that being said in my games I have to do damage control and that's exactly what I'm frustrated about. I fail their mid HARD in almost every game and in most cases they commit other team mates to try and kill me which gives my teammates room to farm more comfortably. Should be easy game when your carry is free farming right? Wrong. I kill them get the gold they die doing the most retarded shit and give it back. Last game I begged them to finish (the main reason for my frustration and why I abused alchem). Retards just won't fucking listen they want to farm for 40 mins and look fancy in fights. I cannot for the life of me just go in and 1v5 even if I'm ahead since the gold that I beat out of them just goes back to them.
This happening is totally fine. I get that there will be some games that I'm just meant to lose but like I said its happening too fucking frequently lately and I can't figure out the reason for it or how to avoid it.
Important Note:
I'm not a 5k(or whatever his mmr is) player like blunt .
I think you can literally pick ANY carry and still win the game with whoever you are placed with in that bracket, 90% of the time. Thing is, you can't avoid losing from time to time, and even if you DO lose you would know you tried your best.
Can't even understand the point of this thread to be honest.
@Jacked
" If anything though, it could be that you're just conservative, not taking risk, hence closing games out much longer than necessary. Without giving your team chance to participate in your kills you may get that 1v9 feeling a lot more. Just some perspective for you"
Decent analysis but unfortunately that's not the case here. I'm only gonna talk about the games I lost since that's the point of this whole thread. In all those games I'm in the middle of the fight. There is no concept of tankers and initiators at 2k (atleast not in SEA or my games -> the ones I lost). I tell them exactly how to make it play out and they just ignore me. Here everyone wants to stay behind and deliver the last blow to increase their kill count. I'm in (all those lost games ) the middle of the fight usually or the one initiating the fight. These games that we are talking about are the ones where team mates just ignore everything I say. Be my guest to watch my last game and see what I was doing. In case you don't have enough time to waste on that let me tell you what happened in one sentence. Me and ds were trying to push while alchem and weaver farmed endlessly ignoring all my pleas to push with the team as 5.
Here is the problem, games like these happen from time to time I get that. BUT THIS FUCKING SHIT is happening soo fucking frequently that its frustrating me. @Best Weaver SEA mentioned something that made me think and that was the point of this thread. To find WHAT THE FUCK is going on, why is this happening, is it happening to others? and how to fucking avoid this shitfest.
@Pitou "Can't even understand the point of this thread to be honest."
WOW I mentioned it 4 fucking times now I suggest using google translator to ease things.
Hate to break it to you but there is no easy way out if shitfests. Man if there was I won't be dilly-dallying in this forum and instead try to raise my MMR. I've tried playing 5 times in Australia yes the saltiness is a bit lower but instead when you are losing everyone is resigned to their fate, saying "It's just a game bro chill." While I do recognize that the fact that Aussies are pretty mild-mannered (good thing of course) compared to SEA players their lack of drive to win (something which SEA players have an abundance of) is frustrating, and I can do nothing about it but instead just laugh along.
I mean if we DO find out the cause of this "retard spike" as you so eloquently put it, we find out WHY, and we find out its frequency, you think we will be able to do something about it?
Something that has been here for as long as Dota 2's MMR was introduced won't change any time soon, if it could then it should have changed years ago, what with Reddit and all.
they're always as bad as your teammates, not just only in certain scenarios
with your statement, you should be winning at least a reasonable 90% of the games
jones you are trying to use communication to win more games than you deserve. but why don't u leave communication to the 8k players, and work on stuff that doesnt need to be communicated to your team?
I found that AM is a very decent well rounded hero to climb out of 2k shit fest. Last game tinker starts feeding intentionally and LC was unintentionally feeding like an intentional feeder. With 2 guys feeding non stop tell me how I'm on equal grounds with the other team and how my team is only as bad as opposition. Anyways I try to stop him he wouldn't listen so instead of bitching and moaning about it I just told everyone to mute and do what they can. We end up winning the game, he didn't get lp for trying his best to throw the game.
@Jacked the other option is to go and end the game 1v5 which is not totally impossible but 1v9 is if you are not useful at least don't feed them non-stop. Also telling the team that we have advantage and can push now is not something reserved to 8ks also I don't have to be 6k to boost my way out of 2k.
@🍩🍪Cookie🍪🍩 Alright genius, flawless logic, let me break it down for you since you are too dense to see what is already out in the open. Here is your statement "your enemies are as bad as your teammates, have you tried destroying the enemy ancient?"
I won't waste too much of my time and pick my very recent lost games but if you insist we can go further back.
https://www.dotabuff.com/matches/2997431991
Here is the link. Game was literally 1v5 and later on 2v5 (feel free to watch the replay if you have any doubts). Team was feeding non stop and running in fights alone always getting caught off positions, ignoring every push call or team fight call we made while theirs went together as 5 all the time. You touch one they all gank up on you. NOW how the fuck can you make argument that my team is as bad as theirs while I'm here with 31 kills 17 assits still losing the games while on their side everyone is doing their part working as a team making it a one sided game.
Much better one
https://www.dotabuff.com/matches/2995934997
55.1k HD the highest after that is 20K by pa vs theirs evenly distributed.
https://www.dotabuff.com/matches/2984623188
Game speaks for itself. I can go on and on.
So far when we are on equal terms I end up winning the game. If someone on my team goes 25+ kills I won't fucking lose that game. How the fuck can you argue that their team is as bad as mine when I'm way fucking ahead while my team fails to take advantage or capitalize on that and help me seize the game. Instead I'm having a hard time doing damage control caused by them. I want to make it very clear that I fully expect this to happen from time to time and its totally fine with me. I accept that. But lately its been happening very frequently and that's fucking frustrating that is all.
Why don't you go jungle and muted 9 of them and pretend you are playing bot game since your teammate is noob no need talk with them?
No communication,no rage easy solo win 
Don't thank me,it's my nature to help.
^ Best advice on dotabuff.
Btw problem is not them being "noob" all the time. I consider myself a noob as well. Its the fucking apes that are absolutely worthless, types of players that make me wonder if a human being can actually be this fucking retarded. It used to happen rarely but now for the past couple of weeks its suddenly a lot more frequent, I wonder what changed.
^Maybe just a bad days for you,maybe last cycle of birth you really did bad thing in that period of time.It's ok,things will get well soon.Focus on self and don't tilted is good way to win game.
anyways, i don't read idiotic low mmr walls of text made out of rage.
you wanna give me your account? i'll get it +1k mmr in a week with AT LEAST 95% winrate
@1iceTea Noted. Well I guess it was a surprise that this started happening so frequently all of a sudden. I was pretty frustrated and opened the thread hoping for a logical explanation to what was going on (@Best Weaver SEA said something that made some sense) but anyways seems like that's the only way to go. Got some pointers which could only help so at least I got something out of it. Thanks for another amazing piece of advice.
@🍩🍪Cookie🍪🍩
I have no doubt in my mind that you did read that wall of text and let me assure you it had nothing to do with rage(by then I was totally past the frustration and had already won 2 more games). You just choose to ignore it since you came with a flawed condescending logic and when challenged on it you decided to go down "anyways, i don't read idiotic low mmr walls of text made out of rage." like an ass wipe. You are the same condescending shit muffin that came on my "Race to 3k" thread claiming that you can boost 2 account from 1 mmr to 3k in 15 days (thinking that we will be awestruck by how amazing player you are even tho blunt is already doing just that and countless others before him did it) while claiming that you have a fucking life.
I do not give a fuck about you or whatever winrate you will generate boosting an account from 1k to 3k. I'm sure the day I have enough time to play 10 hours a day I will get somewhere with this game(I will gain mmr in any case with time). You came over last thread trying to show how impressive it is that you can boost an account since you are soo fucking pro at a fucking video game. Blunt is already doing it thousands other did it and if I wanted to get my account boosted I would have done that a long time ago. So get over yourself because no one gives a fuck (at least I don't) about how good you are at dota 2 and how you can spend 10 hours a day to beat 1k players while accomplishing absolutely nothing. Save your time and brag about it to someone who actually cares.
for someone who plays casually u appear to be quite emotionally invested. perhaps dota 2 is not the game for you!
i read the first sentence, see how ignorant and stupid it is and then i stop giving a fuck.
you're not different than any other stupid low moron, complaining about teammates like a little baby
@JDF8 I had just lost a game and was frustrated there so I wrote that while finding another one. Apparently 3 mins is more than enough to type that in. Plus it happened back to back and so I made the thread, this is not the first time this is happening and it won't be the last so usually I don't really care. It happens, was just wondering why its soo frequent all of a sudden. I like how you took the time to put them in and then place the screen shot here.
@🍩🍪Cookie🍪🍩 First of all my first sentence was to 1iceTea. Also I never actually said that I'm low mmr only because of my team mates I just said that I used to get worthless team mates rarely now all of a sudden its much more frequent so what happened. From your retarded logic earlier and your comments on the Race to 3k I can figure why you missed that. A fucking loser challenging 1k's saying he can play 10 hours a day everyday to grind mmr that will accomplish absolutely nothing is clearly a sign of a no life ass hat. Literally played 8 games on a fucking smurf in last 24 hours on a tuesday. I will leave you to it, I understand your need to brag about how good you are in dota 2, if I spend all my day on something I might want to do it as well. Anything you post now will be ignored (thread is done anyways), AMAZING 5.5K weeaboo.
@ Cookie, can you take a look at my topic and answer my questions, I'd really appriciate your time.
"Also by your logic even if I am a significantly higher MMR player imagine what it would be like for a real 2k player to try and climb out of that region?"
almost impossible mate ^^ check my last 5 games, i literally cant do anything
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Before you go ahead talking shit I'm actually 2k and yes this is my account. With that being said only games that I recently lost are simply 1v9 and I get that this happens from time to time. BUT WTF how can this shit happen so fucking frequently like after every 2 games there is a game where I'm literally trying to win the game 1v5(1v9 actually because not only are they absolutely fucking useless but they are feeding machines). Absolutely worthless shit stains just running around like headless chicken. They don't listen or do anything useful, they just run around like retards and get caught in the worst positions and that is all they do. I have no idea wtf is happening like this thing is expected to happen once every 10 games where its impossible to win a game but why the fuck am I getting games like that after every 2 games. Also what baffles me more than anything is that how the fuck can someone be soo fucking retarded like literally 50 IQ pigs in my team in those games, absolutely brain dead. I'm seriously forced to believe that these are not even real people but fucking flee infested apes behind those computer screens.
That concludes the rant but the question is serious. I'm not the one to bitch and moan about my team and I totally expect this to happen from time to time but its too fucking frequent and it doesn't make any sense as to why the fuck this is happening. I'm going to tag some recent conduct summaries to clear out that its not because I abuse the shit out of everyone and have a bad behavior score.